The Birth of Olivia Grace

So, the Head Family just got a little larger. On Wednesday, December 17, 2008, Olivia Grace joined our family. This birth was completely different from the events of Oscar's birth. It was totally calm. Tiff's doctor was there for a while before the baby came. He checked her a few times and then all of the sudden they were breaking down the bed getting ready to go. I almost didn't realize what was about to happen. Then in a couple of pushes, she entered the world.

I think I was in shock for a while. I was moving around taking pictures and watching what was happening but somewhere in my mind something kept saying "What is this thing?" I think the simple fact that I had a baby at home kept me telling myself "I don't have another baby." But as the day went on, it finally sunk in.

All I can say about her is that she is absolutely beautiful. She has brought me so much joy. I am grateful to Tiff for here carrying her and going through the pains of the last 9 months so that she could be here.

So, many of you were involved in a poll that was posted on Tiffany's blog about her name. Choosing her name was such a tough decision. Little Olivia did not have a name for about 3 or 4 hours. We kept bouncing back and forth between a few. I originally was leaning toward Emiline Grace and Tiff immediately said Ava. It finally came down to three choices: Emiline Grace, Olivia Grace, and Ella Marie. I fought Olivia for a while because it is pretty popular but in the end, it just fit the best. We are going to call her Livvy most of the time. Thanks to all of you for your input on the name.

Thank you everyone who has helped out in the recent months as Tiff has gone on bed rest and we have needed so much help. It has been a crazy time for our family, but one in which we have been truly blessed.

Tiff has a lot of pictures posted on her blog that you all might enjoy. Check it out if you want to see them. Have a Merry Christmas!

Hanging With The Police (Not the Band)

So for the past three weeks at work, I have been working on a project which involves mapping out all of the bus stop locations in the Treasure Valley. As part of this project, my coworker and I have to go out with a big expensive GPS unit we rented and a camera and mark the latitude/longitude of each stop as well as take a couple of pictures. So far, after about 600 stops, we have not had any problems. Today was a different story.

We stopped to do the bus stop at the corner of State Street and Willow Lane in Boise. For those who are not familiar with this area, there are not a lot of places on the south side of the road to pull of the road, so we pulled into the driveway of a small mechanic shop called Auto Gym. Our work usually takes about a minute so we were not too concerned about being in the way. After getting what I needed to get, I headed back to the car. My coworker was already in the car waiting. As I headed for the car I noticed the owner of the shop standing by our car looking inside. As I approached he asked if I worked for the bus company. The project we are doing is being done in conjunction with the people who run the buses. I told him this and then he proceeded to complain about the location of the stop in front of his business. I told him he needed to contact the bus company directly as the location of the stops was not our job.

Apparently, we looked suspicious in our dress clothes and jackets with a GPS and a camera because then he started demanding our names and saying that we are on private property. I have never been to a mechanic which did not want cars on their property, but hey, there is a first time for everything. I told him we would leave and tried to get in the car. When I tried to close the door he grabbed the door and began to demand my card (which I was not carrying at the time). He even demanded my license. When he became upset saying we are not private investigators and he needed our information. At that point in time my coworker started screaming at the guy to leave us alone and let us go. He then reached into our car and ripped the $5,000 GPS from my hands, breaking the strap off the back. The GPS went flying from his hands and landed not so softly on the concrete behind him. Both my coworker and I got out of the car to try and get the GPS back while he grabbed it and started walking off. We told him we were calling the police. He then told us that he was going to say the GPS just fell and that we had stole a cell phone that he claimed disappeared from one of the cars in the minute that we were there. My coworker followed him still screaming and trying to get our GPS while I dialed 911.

I must have been just a little bit frazzled at this point because the dispatcher had to stop me after about a minute to tell me he could not understand a word I was saying. I finally calmed down enough to talk and the police were on their way. In the mean time the guy gave the unit back to my coworker. We stood by the side of the road for a couple of minutes. When the police finally arrived (we got two cars and four police, no lights and sirens though...I was a little disappointed) two talked to the guy and we talked to the other two. They took our stories and then talked. It seems our two stories were different (go figure). They said that since the GPS was not greatly damaged and because our stories were different, that there was not much that could be done. They said that we could go and that they would talk to the guy. I was a little disappointed that nothing more interesting was going to come of it, but I would say I had got enough excitement out of it.

So the moral of the story is...before you stop at a mechanic, make sure he likes cars on his property.



I have included a somewhat dated photo of the business (thanks to Google Map Street View) for anyone who might need some excitement added to there day. Make sure to take a camera and dress suspicious.

A Day For Which I Am Grateful

It is currently 8:00 AM on the morning in which my family will be given the blessing of being sealed together. I am overcome with emotion as I think of how much love my Heavenly Father has showed me thoughout my life. I truly have been given the best family for me and and I can barely express how wonderful it feels to know that Heavenly father provided me this blessing.

There was a song which expresses the feelings I have about Tiff and my relationship and the feelings that I have about Heavenly Father's participation in us coming together. Some of you heard this when we got married but today the words mean even more to me. I have copied the lyrics here.

Bless the Broken Road

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

Tiffany, you are the greatest miracle in my life. You have given me hope and the vision that our family can be eternal. I can scarce comprehend all the sacrifices you make daily for me and for our children. And yet you do them without complaint with complete love. I am so grateful that God has led me to you and that I have you to be my eternal companion. Heaven would be Hell without you there. I can assure that our family would never make it without you. My world could not exist without you in it. I love, love, love you!

Now I want to take a brief moment to express my feelings to my children, if you will ingulge me.

Allison, I love you so much. Your tender spirit and sensitivity bonds me to you. I love how eager you are to learn and grow. It makes me laugh how you work so hard to make us all happy. You were the first to accept me as your father and you have truly made me feel that I am. As I watch you grow, I can see how beautiful of a woman you are and will become. You are a blessing in my life.

Charlie, I love you so much. I never have considered myself a real man's man and so the responsibility to teach you to become a man scares me a little. But your sweet smile and infectious personallity truly tells me that I can. I love how much you love your mother. I hope if there is one thing I can teach you in life it is that you always love your mother and that someday you love and treat your wife like you do your mother. I love your personality and how you teach me to not take life so seriously. You are a miracle in my life.

Oscar, I love you so much. I did not realize how deep my feelings of love for my children were until you came into this world. I truly did not realize how much I cared for you and your siblings. But the feelings and emotions that your birth and life have given me, have taught me how truly precious all of your lives are. Oscar you make me feel needed and wanted and that means a lot to a father. I love your smile and laugh. It make me keep working each day. I love you, son. You are a gift to me.

For all of you who are celebrating with us this day, thank you for the love and support you have shown us as we have come along this road that has brought us here. Whether you will be present with us in the temple or far away, your love and prayers are felt. Thank you and we love you all.

The Greatest News

So the day I have been waiting for has finally been given the go ahead.

While there are so many things I am grateful for in my life, there is nothing I am more grateful for than how God took me from my lowest point and gave me the greatest woman who has ever lived to be my wife. I could not have asked for more. For anyone who knows Tiffany, you will understand what I mean. Tiffany is beautiful in every which way.

Since the day Tiff and I decided to marry and form this amazing family, our dream was to someday be sealed together. For those who may not know, it is our belief that a family can be eternal and extend its bonds through death into the here after. One of things that makes that possible is being married to our spouse in a temple. This marriage ceremony is called a sealing. A couple truly becomes one and as long as there is faithfulness to the covenants we make there, the Lord gives us the promise that we can be together with our families forever. Tiff and I have offered countless prayers that this would someday become a reality.

One of the things that made it more difficult though was that Tiff and I had been sealed to our previous spouses. In order for Tiff and I to be able to have this blessing, it was necessary to meet the requirements and then petition the First Presidency for the clearance/cancellation of our first marriages. We have been going through the process and our requests were sent out truly not long ago. What then happens is that the prophet, the President of the Church, and his counselors, pray on our behalf to know the will of the Lord. If there are questions or concerns, letters will be sent back to us. This process can take a long, long time and for some, the time may not ever come when the approval is granted because of the circumstances. So yesterday when I went to get the mail and saw two letters from the Office of the First Presidency of the church, I felt such elation.

To know that the Prophet of God has prayed for me and my family is amazing enough, but what is more incredible to me is that the Lord knew and made it clear to them so quickly that this was right. It reaffirms what I already knew: that God has been part of bringing Tiff and I together from the very beginning. I am grateful he knows us and that he loves us. I am grateful he loves me enough to have given me one of his daughters who is beyond perfection herself to offset my imperfection. I am and will be eternally grateful that I will soon have a family that can truly be eternal.

So for the details of when the sealing will take place, we are not sure yet. We will post an update as soon as we know. We still need to get our recommends to be sealed from the Bishop and Stake President and also find out what the situation will be with being sealed to Oscar. Our letters indicated that a seperate letter would be sent to our Stake President regarding that, so, we need to work that out with him. I am so excited and feel such gratitude that my greatest dream will become a reality soon enough.

For any who have offered prayers in our behalf or have been part of this process in any way, thank you. We love you all!

A Great Vacation

Since last Wednesday, Tiff, the kids and I have been on vacation. It was so nice to finally take some time off that was not for some family emergency. It is amazing how much fun and also how tiring just a few days can be. I am glad I have tomorrow off to recuperate. I am going to include pictures in this blog (not a normal thing) so I may get in trouble from Tiff for stealing her thunder but oh, well the story is much better with pictures. Besides she probably will not get to post for a while since she is leaving again tomorrow to go to the Johnson cabin in McCall with Joan and Virgil, the kids grandparents.

So here's the summary:

Tuesday Night - I will start here even though it was not officially part of the vacation. Since I was little I have gotten overexcited about going on vacations and never can sleep the night before. I was up until 2 AM doing random things like going to Winco at 12:30 AM to get pop for the trip and coming home with chips and salsa, bagels, and NO pop. The worst part was that I still had to go to work the next day.

Wednesday - After work I met Tiff and the kids and we headed out of town. Our first stop was in Twin Falls, ID. Our main purpose in stopping was to attend the Twin Falls Temple Open House. Ali has been waiting for this event for months. She has been so anxious to actually go inside a temple. The funny thing is that when she told her dad about it tonight on the phone her summary was that she had to where white things on her feet. What a cute girl! Here are some pictures:







One of my favorite parts of the evening is when our brilliant little Charlie taught his Grandma and Grandpa a basic truth. Virgil asked Joan who the temple president was. Charlie quickly responded, "Jesus". It is moments like these that makes a parent feel so proud.

Thursday - Thursday morning we woke up early and drove to Farmington, UT to go to Lagoon. For those who might not know, Lagoon is a small but very fun amusement/water park. The kids were so excited. We entered the park at 10:45 AM and left around 8:00 PM with Charlie screaming he wanted to go on more rides. The kids were diehards. Lagoon has a really good childrens' area with small versions of the bigger rides. The lines are never very long so the kids just keep going and going. I believe there were a few rides that they rode as many as ten times.

With Tiff being pregnant and us needing to take care of Oscar, the day really became about Ali and Charlie. I did manage to sneek away to some of the bigger rides which made the day fulfilling for me. Ali even went on a big rollercoaster with me, although, I am not so sure she will do that again. She claimed she could not breath when the ride when downward. Poor thing. She was brave enough to do it so I will give her the credit she deserves for just being brave enough to do it.

After we left the park we drove another hour to Provo, UT to get to an ice cream shop called The Creamery on the Brigham Young University campus. I know it sounds pretty sad when I would keep my kids up until about 11:00 PM just to get ice cream but anyone who has ever tried this should know why. All the ice cream is made fresh at the school. It is incredible. Sorry, blogging about food is a little lame.

That night we stayed with my brother, Rod, and his family in Payson. It was so good to see them. Tiff and I ended up talking with them until about 4:00 AM. We see them so rarely so it was great to catch up.

Here are some pictures from Thursday:






Friday & Saturday - These two days were the main attraction for me. The main reason we went on this vacation was to go to a family reunion in Henrieville, UT where my Grandma lives. This extremely small town has been a vacation destination for my family since as long as I can remember. Unfortunately I have not been back and stayed for almost five years. I was so excited to introduce Tiff and the kids to this place that feels as much like home as my own.

What made the trip even better was that is was to a family reunion. Family is really big on my mom's side and so when one of these events goes on, everybody goes: aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. My grandma even had a great great grandchild there. These events have changed throughout the years as us grandchildren have aged and had our own children but the essence is still the same.

We spent a good part of the time sitting out on Grandma's front lawn, migrating around to stay in the shade and visiting about anything and everything. The children would all be running around, playing like children should with no limitations. One of the greatest parts about being in Henrieville as a kid is that you can play in the streets without fear. I think Tiff's definition was that she did not realize how "podunky" the town really is. But that is one of the greatest benefits. The town sits just south of Bryce Canyon National Park in a picturesque setting of mesas and beautiful red and white sandstone mountains. The peace and quite of this small town made for many days of hikings, getting dirty, swinging from trees, running without rules, and I am so glad my children now have got to experience it.

This family reunion was like many others. There were games and singing. We had a couple inpromptu concerts. We watched a movie on the side of house and camped on the lawn. We stayed up late and got up early. We cried missing those not there, especially Grandpa and we laughed as all the new babies entertained us. I think the pictures will show it best:









Sunday - As the trip wound down and after all was packed up, the long trip home began. We decided to drive the whole 10 hour trip at once today which made for some more entertaining moments. I thought you might enjoy these:







The most important thing I got from the last few days is how wonderful and blessed we are to be part of families. May we all take the time to stay close and love one another. I love you all!

Missing

Tonight was a night of longing for me. My family and I are preparing to go to a family reunion at my grandparents' house in southern Utah this week. As part of our preparation, I decided to have a family night tomorrow in which I would tell the children stories about my Grandma and Grandpa Willis. I was watching a slide show I have of them trying to get ready. I did not expect to have the emotions I did.

You see, my Grandpa died in 2002 while I was on my mission in Mexico. He was one of my greatest friends. I loved to sit by his side and listen to the stories he would tell (sometimes, the same stories multiple times in one sitting there towards the end when his dimentia got really bad). He loved to listen to me play my guitar and he always called my his little George Strait (a country singer for those who may not know). He also called me his Little Toe Head. I loved it. I really missed those times as I sat and thought of him tonight. This week will be really only the third time I have been back since he died. I truly will miss his presence this weekend.

After I finished watching the slide show Tiffany told me to look at my sister's new post on her blog. My sister just moved to New Hampshire. I was already in a sappy mood but this put me over the top. I love my sister and miss her tons. I am happy they are making the sacrifice for Mike, my brother-in-law, to go to school. I know it is good for them, but...I still miss them. So, as a personal note, I just want to say, I love you Laura, Miles, Caliegh, Griff, and Ellie. Mike, I know you do not like the sappy stuff so I will just say...you rock.

A Dream To Begin

So in a not-so-recent post (I say that because I have been criticized for not posting very often, sorry) I sought your advice on something I could do for humanity. I wanted to do something big. I received a few responses which were very helpful. I was especially grateful to an old mission companion who encouraged me to dream big.

So I have been praying and pondering on this for a while and an idea has begun to take shape. While it is still very much in its infancy, my idea is to develop low to very low-income housing to help alliviate some of the pressures that being financially burdened can cause so that the poor can begin to seek solutions that would help them escape the circumstances they are in. I recognize that in the world today, there are many people who at no fault of their own, they are struggling: to eat, to live, to escape their situation. I want to provide housing and then help create opportunities for advancement such as financial education, how to access scholarships for education, self-sustainability. I want to do more than give people a place to live. I want to give parents hope and children the opportunity to dream.

So my current plan is to slowly develop a plan and the resources to form a non-profit organization and then to go after the grants and funding to be able to realize my dream. So, if any one out there has any knowledge, suggestions or advice, please let me know. I may not have all the knowledge but I have the drive and determination to see that this dream comes to fruition.

Something In The Right Direction

One of my greatest passions in life is being able to learn. Whatever the subject, if it increases my knowledge even a little, count me in. This may be the reason why my collegiate record has been a little scattered. I find myself wanting to have my foot in all doors but not enough toes to keep them all open.

Because of this love, it has long been my goal to work in academia. There have been many things that have tried to stand in my way and many times I have thought I would admit defeat but the desire has never died. This past week a pathway was cleared for me which has made me excited once again.

You see I have never been excited about learning as job prep. I think learning should be done for the sake of learning with job preparation being a necessary evil that tags along. So, for the past year or so I have been bouncing back and forth trying to decide what I wanted to do for my graduate studies. I have been following very closing the creation of a masters program in Community and Regional Planning at Boise State. I went in to meet with my academic counselor last Friday. I told her my goals and what I wanted to accomplish. At this time she told me of a PhD program was also being established that would tie in closely to the Masters program I will be pursuing. For those who do not know, it is almost mandatory to have a PhD in something in order to work/teach at the university level. When she told me this, the road blocks that have been popping up seemed to vanish and my goal became a little more attainable. Now that is a step in the right direction.

Need Some Help

So over the past week I became aware that way more people look at this blog that I had ever imagined (Shout out to my friends in Cali). When you only get a comment or two, it really makes you think that your writing for yourself. I am not complaining because to be honest, I am not great at commenting either. But I need some help and I am hoping that I can use this medium to get some input back.

Yesterday in a staff meeting at my work, my boss was commenting on our generation. He was saying his dad belonged to the generation known as the "greatest generation that ever lived". His question was what would our generation be known as. He suggested that we would be the "gimme" generation: a generation which wants everything but does not want to work or pay for it. A little deep of a thought for a staff meeting but it really got me thinking. I really do not want to be know for that so I decided that I want to do something.

So here is my request: I am looking for ideas on things I can do to better the world I live in. I am not looking for something small that will affect my family only. I am looking for something which I can do on an ongoing basis that will benefit many people or atleast that will get other people involved. If you have any ideas which you have had that you would be willing to share with me, please comment on this post. I would love to hear your ideas. I truly believe that we can live in a better world if we all do something. Please help me figure out what that something is that I can do.

And Life Moves On

There is a strange phenomenon which you will experience at certain points in your life. Something big happens and your world stops. Your mind is on that one thing and you just cannot get out of the funk. And then with time, you realize that while you were there, the world kept on moving.

This last week was one of those times for me. With Dad's passing I experienced so many unexplained (and unexpected) emotions. At first it was a matter of being strong. There was work to do. My first thought after getting the call from Mom was that I needed to take care of this...and that...and...How strange it is that this was my first emotion. I didn't breakdown. I went to work trying to take care of things. I think that was my effort as a husband and son-in-law to be there for Tiff and Mom to lean on.

I quickly learned that my fascade was not as convincing as I had imagined it to be. That night after what I had concidered to be my job was done, I had a moment on my own. Knowing that then was not the time to try and lean on Tiff, I called a friend and talked about what had happened, what I had experienced, and anything else we could come up with. I just wasn't quite ready to approach my thoughts by myself.

As the week went by, sleep became a premium, and much of my initial strength (or what I thought was strength) faded. I realized quickly that Tiff was going to need me. There were a few days after it happened that I did not really see my wife for more than a few minutes at a time. I can probably thank Dad for the work ethic he instilled in his daughter because Tiff had a project to do and it was her life for those few days. I spent that time taking care of the kids, trying to find some solace in being able to help.

Then came Tuesday and it finally hit me. Tiff and I were driving in the car and all my emotions came out. There is something that a wife can do, even without words, that no one else can do for a husband. Feelings that I did not even realize existed came pouring out and I found myself sobbing on the shoulder of the one I was supposed to be comforting. This is another credit to my wife because even when she had no way of knowing how to comfort me, she did it. I love her for her ability to love.

Dad's funeral for me was an event that, after the ups and downs of the week, I needed. I needed to celebrate him. I needed to escape the funk. I needed to know that we could move on. Dad was an incredible man. His funeral was amazing. The stories of each child which were shared showed me how a father should love his family. The stories showed how Dad was so good at expressing personally how much he loved his children. I know he would have been pleased.

Saturday after the funeral was another day of struggle for me. As the day went on, the family, those who I had grown so close to over the last week, began to leave. With the departure of each one, knowing I would not see them in a few hours or even the next day, I felt a little piece of me leave. I am grateful for what I have gained from this week in my relationship with them. I feel more a part of this family than ever and I am truly blessed.

To each person who has played a part and taken this time out with me, thank you. Thank you for your love and support of my family and me. Thank you for grieving our loss as well as yours. And in the end, thank you for keeping life moving so that the surrealty of the past week can play just a small part in the experience we call life. And life moves on...

A Time of Sadness and Reflection

It is with great sadness I report the passing of my dear father-in-law, Kenneth Gene Shaffer, who died on April 17th, 2008 in his home. Since I learned of this sad event, I have had little time to reflect on my thoughts and feelings for this great man. I would like to take the opportunity now.

I have not had the privelege to know Dad as long as the rest of the family. Having come into the family a little over a year ago, my memories are few. This being said the impression that he has left on me cannot be overstated.

One of the first memories I have of Dad was at his 60th birthday party. As part of the event, each one of his children present took a moment to recall some of the memories and things that Dad had taught them. It was inspiring to listen to, one, the love they had for him, and two, the great example he had been in their lives. The example which stood out most in their stories was his example of work.

You see dad contracted polio at a very early age and suffered the consiquences of that for the rest of his life. This disease left Dad constant pain, physically and emotionally. This being said, the example he gave to his children and the impression he left on me was how hard he worked. Dad owned his own business for nearly twenty years, many times doing work his pain should never have let him do. This example inspires me to seek to better serve my family, hoping that my children have the same example that Dad's did.

I am told that the time I knew Dad was some of his happiest. One of the things that helped with this was when Mom and Dad sold the business and Dad "retired". I put that in quotes because what Dad started doing upon his retirement was anything but retiring. He began an awe-inspiring effort to give of himself to help other people. During this time, Dad became a Big Brother. He read for the blind and trained seeing eye dogs. He put his own dog through a course so that he could take her to the hospital to help lift patients there. It was truly impressive. Each time we would see Dad he would have found some new way to help somebody else. It was impressive. I have heard my own father who will retire in the upcoming months say that Dad's example has inspired him to do something with the extra time that "retirement" provides.

One of my favorite memories of Dad was this funny little tag he used to where. Dad heard somewhere that if you got a certain number of hugs in a day, you would be healthier and happier. So Dad decided to put this into action. He was relentless in his effort to meet the quota. Tiff made him a tag that said "Free Hugs" and he went and paid to have cards printed that indicated the same. On one occasion he even went to a local grocery store to seek out people to whom he could give hugs because he was still a few shy of the daily allotment. He was blessed by his efforts because on arriving at the store he found two young ladies with a sign that said none other than "Free Hugs". Having met his quota, he returned home happy. It is rumored he even had a small collection of people at the Elks Rehab where he worked out who were on a circuit for him to visit and receive a hug from. I love how eagerly he went about this and being the recipient of many of his hugs, I can tell you he hugged because he cared.

These memories and lessons will long ring in the belltower of my mind but the memory that will ring the loudest and most clear of my father-in-law will be the privilege I had to stand with him this past Sunday, worthy and true, as we held our beloved Oscar in our arms and gave him a name and a blessing. One of the impressions I had as I pronounced the blessing upon him was that Oscar has been blessed with great men as grandfathers. I know these words were true then and will forever be. Dad was a great man. I hope that I can make the impression on my childrens' life that he has made on mine.

I love you, Dad! May God be with you until we meet again. Your legacy lives on.

*I would encourage you all to visit my dear, sweet Tiffany's page to read her tribute to her father. Please keep the Shaffers in your prayers in particular Mom, as the upcoming months will be full of occassions where those added blessings will be needed. I also want to thank all of you who have called, visited, brought in food, prayed already, or even had us in your thoughts. Your love and concern has not gone unnoticed.

Another Day and "What's Up in Head's Head - The Conclusion"

I have been told I need to complete my series entitled "What's up in Head's Head" for those who were interested. I also have some more thoughts on the day which I wish to express.

For all interested, I visited with a great neurologist on Friday and was diagnosed with migraines. He said the main reason I had not responded to the medication before was that it did not get me ahead of the pain so now I am on like a bazillion pills which I am told will do that trick. I am told that the it really takes finding the right medication and then learning to live with it. I am pleased that it was nothing more serious. I am thankful for a good doctor who could recognize it and explain it so well.

I feel bad making additional posts which will move down my comments regarding my feelings for my father-in-law. I truly with to pay my respcts to him and wish that that post could stay at the top for a long time.

Mourning is a strange thing. The range of emotions that one can go through in a brief moment are such a rollercoaster. Today I have felt happy, sad, a little confused, and overwhelmed. I miss my father-in-law. Tonight Ali and Charlie came home from thier father's home and walked in to Mom's house. I was sitting in Dad's recliner at the time. I just felt so sad for them at that time. Charlie did say something that made me smile in his prayer tonight. In his prayer he asked Heavenly Father to give Papa Shaffer a hug for him. He said this all on his own. I think I will pray the same thing tonight.

Thank you for listening to my feelings and emotions right now. I hope you understand that by posting these things that are so personal to me, I am only trying to get them out of me and am trying to work things out in my head. The catharsis of this is really helping me. Thank you again for reading.

What's Up In Head's Head - Part 2

So just a brief update. I am going to the neurologist on Friday at 8:30 AM. I am feeling about the same but I am trying to have a good attitude there is so much more to think about that being sick. I am so blessed in this life, especially to have a great wife and family, and safe, warm home, and a wonderful job. Could I ask for anything more?

On a lighter note, I thought I would share something that I think is a great lesson. I heard this and think it should be something we all think about. If you have a while and want to see more, the original full speech can be seen below this edited version. Don't blink.

What's Up in Head's Head

So for most people the series of posts which will come under the title of "What's Up in Head's Head" will be rather boring and you might want to just skip them. For the most part I will be posting them so my mother can not worry near as much as she would if she did not have this information. Below is a brief description of what this series will intail, so feel free to decide if you want read on or not.

So for that last month or so I have been experiencing some problems in my head. I have been having headaches every morning and every night and been very fatigued daily. I have been having some other problems connected to this which have caused Tiff and I some concern. This last week I went to the doctor only to leave with an unconclusive answer. He had me take some medication for tension headaches to see if that would resolve the problem. Besides saying some pretty crazy things when I was hopped up on the meds, there was no real effect.

Today's update - I called the doctor this morning to give him and update on how the meds and had gone and to try and find out what the next step was going to be. When I first called I spoke to his nurse and felt like I was being pushed into them wanting to solve a problem I didn't think I had. The nurse indicated that they would probably give me another type of meds to try and solve the "migraines". I was unaware that this was my diagnosis. I was a little frustrated mainly because it felt like the doctor was just stabbing at a solution. She said she would talk to the doctor and get back with me.

So me being the stubborn person I am immediately did some research on the internet and found out the symptoms of migraines. I could see how they came to the diagnosis but I was missing some pretty obvious sign like the lack of sensitivity to light, the fact the the headaches did not improve with rest, and that they did not get worse with activity. So when the doctor called back (yeah, I actually got to talk to my doctor) I had a few questions.

He wanted me to try a migraine-specific medication to see if that would relieve the headaches. His plan was to do this and then to send in a referal to a neurologist if the meds didn't help. When I told him some of my concerns about it not being migraines, he said that he still wanted to try the meds but he wanted to send in a referral to a neurologist right away instead of waiting.

So, I came home with some extra work this afternoon so I could try to shake some light-headedness (that is not a word) and I took the new meds. I woke up with the closest feeling I could imagine to what it feels like being drunk. The head still hurt but it felt like it was in someone elses body. That was interesting. It has subsided some this evening but the headache has not. So I guess for now the next step will be with the neurologist.

While this has been a little (I say that loosely) trying, I am holding onto a promise I was given in a blessing I received this week end. I was told I would recover completely. I know that this will happen because I have faith in blessings. For now we are just trying our best to make the most of it.

I have to say I have the best wife in the whole world. She has been so supportive and helpful. I love her so very much. Thank you Tiff.

All the Family

I just wanted to share these pictures of the post-blessing fun. I have some of the cutest family ever. And yes, I said cutest. I know. I'm a guy and should not use the word cute but...can you blame me?

Oscar's Blessing

One of the greatest joys I have yet experienced as a father occured today. Today I had the privelege to be the mouth piece for Oscar's baby blessing. It was made more special in that I was surrounded by so much worthy priesthood. I am grateful Oscar has three worthy grandfathers and that he had four of his uncles there surrounding him (Chris, Rod, Mike, and Ryan). He is blessed to have these great examples.

Once again, today I was reminded that our Heavenly Father has sent us a very special son who will do great things. It is now up to us to help train him right so that he makes those good decisions in his life so the blessings he was promised are realized.

Although most of you who read my blog will also read Tiff's and I am sure she will post this, I want to post my favorite picture of this special day.

A Wonderful Weekend

What an incredible weekend this has been thus far. Besides it being Tiff and my anniversary (I love you, Tiff! See Tiff's blog for my feelings on that.) it has been General Conference weekend. I am grateful that we as members of the church have this opportunity so frequently to be instructed from on high.

One of the best parts of this conference for me was being able to participate in the Solemn Assembly. It was a special experience for me as a priesthood bearer to stand with my quorum and say that we as body of brethren will support the prophet and then again as a family to stand together with the millions all over the world to say that we will support him was inspiring. I know he is called of God to lead us today.

Since I turned twelve, I can always remember attending priesthood session with my Dad and my brothers. A few years ago, my father and I decided that we would continue this tradition. Last night, together we made a trip out to Middleton where my brother lives to enjoy conference with him. How grateful I am that I have these examples in my life of honoring and living the priesthood.

The greatest lesson I could feel out of last nights conference session was that it is time to live what we know. All the speakers seemed to say, "We have talked about it enough, lets get out there and do it". I think this is what President Monson's life has exemplified. How lucky we are to have this example. One thing that is well known about President Monson are his stories. As I thought about the messages, I realized that part of the purpose of this is that it makes clear for us how to apply the teachings. It is a blessing to have such an inspired man to lead us today.

One of the things I have learned recently in reading a book by President Eyring is that we as member of the church, when we listen to someone sent by him to teach, we have the right and privilege to hear his voice. This is one of the blessing of the command "receive the Holy Ghost". If we prepare ourselves and listen with a will set on obeying, his voice will come through the power of the Holy Ghost into our hearts and our minds. It was privilege yesterday to experience this and I am truly grateful.
I felt as I listened to the words spoken, either in their message directly or in just some gentle way, the Spirit spoke to me. A little here and a little there, he spoke to me. How I love my Father in Heaven. Now this has made me truly excited for another day of conference.

A Lesson in Friendship

There have been a few times lately that the need to be a better friend has been jumping up in my face. The lessons have come in different ways: so discrete, so obvious. No matter how they come, the message is clear "You've gotta be a better friend.

So I have a strange fear. It is not disabling but at times it causes problems. Basically, talking on the phone scares me. I always think that the person on the other line is completely annoyed by me or I will be awkward and they will laugh at me. I think I just like face-to-face interaction better because then I can read what the people are thinking. I get the same way with drivethroughs at restaurants. I think I drive Tiff crazy because I would much rather go inside than talk (or rather scream) into that silly box outside.

So ... Why am I making this confession in the midst of a message about the need to be a better friend? Mainly because my lame-o fear leads me to avoid making phone calls at times which leads me to either forget too or blow off calling people back. Yeah, I know. That is completely lame. I would think it was lame if it happened to me. Well, I have had a friend or two call me on it lately. I decided the other day to turn over a new leaf and force myself to be better at this. So far, I am doing better two days and counting (for me, that's an accomplishment).

Also, my new exposure to Facebook has brought from the recesses of my mind a number of memories as I have found old friends and acquaintances. As I think back on some of those times I realize, I was not always the best of friends to those around me. I think and still do think I put too much emphasis on my needs and not those of others. While I hate that I do or have done this, once again I am trying to forgive myself by seeking for a change of heart. Once again, two days and counting, things are looking up. (For any that might read this whom I might have wronged just by my bad behavior, please accept my apology.)

Lastly, on this previous Sunday, our lesson in Priesthood/Relief Society was regarding being a better friend. Our leaders spoke to us about being better friends to those around us, more specifically our neighbors. I am trying to take this into consideration as I go about my life.

Now, I hope this message did not sound like I was being too down on myself. I am only expressing how I have felt. I am grateful that there is always another day, another moment, another second to follow our mistakes so that we have a time to repent and change. As my daughter taught me recently, "we are all just trying to learn".

The Quest for Friends

So Tiff introduced me tonight to Facebook. I was quite resistant at first until I realized how easy it made it to find old friends. That is how Tiff got hooked in. She told me this morning that she was up until 1:00 AM last night looking up friends. I thought she was crazy.

Then...after Tiff showed me who I could find on there, I sat checking my page ever few minutes until I finally started getting friends. Man am I lame! Lame, but with friends. PS I have five friends...wait let me check it. I may have more.

Super Tuesday

Yes We Can Obama Song by Will.I.Am

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Please do not take me posting this on my blog as any indication that I have made up my mind as to who I will be voting for. To be honest, I have done very little research into the presidential elections this year. I just get sick of candidates screaming at each other and trying to tear down each other when what they should be doing is trying to figure out together how to fix things. I think that is why the message of this video touched me so much. I truly believe that if we as a nation come together and believe, have hope, we can change. We can make our nation rise and be the nation that God and the founders of our nation believed we could be. I guess I hope by posting this here, while I may or may not end up supporting Obama, the hope for change that he speaks of might grow a little more in each of us so that together we can do something. WE CAN CHANGE!

A Prophet Called

Today at 11:00 AM President Thomas S. Monson was announced as the new president and prophet for the church. He has asked Henry B. Eyring and Dieter F. Uchdorf to act as his first and second counselors, respectively.

As I have pondered on my life, I can remember President Monson almost continually serving in the First Presidency of the church. For a long time, President Hinckley was the only one I could ever imagine as prophet and president of the church. I must admit I could not ever imagine President Monson in that position. It was not this was with President Hinckley (at least as well as I can remember). Because of this, I was a little concerned when I knew that this calling was immenent.

In preparation for this time, I have found myself asking the Lord frequently for his confirmation that President Monson is indeed his prophet. Today as I watched the press conference on the internet, I found myself on the the verge of tears. I truly felt the confirmation from God that Thomas S. Monson has been called of Him to be the prophet, seer, revelator, and president for the Church today.

A Week of Changes (Life is Fragile)

Wow! I never knew a week of life could bring so many emotions. This week made me run the whole gambit.

On January 25, 2008 at 10:50 PM, my little boy was born. Oscar Willis Head, the name we finally decided on brought with him so many new feelings. Not having been a father to a new born, I was not ready for the sense of constant concern that I have felt this week. Oscar came into this world a little under weight. He was 5lbs 14 oz. While the doctors did not seem to be too concerned, I found myself worrying over every sniffle, squeak and sigh. I think one of the first questions I asked the nurse after he was born was "How do you tell if he is still alive?" I am not sure why it has scared me so much. I think it was just how fragile he seemed and how truly dependant he is on our care.

It did not help my constant concern to have the doctors send us back to the hospital on Tuesday. Oscar had a little bit of jaundice this week. He also was having a hard time keeping his temperature and weight up. So Tuesday found us on the pediatric floor at St. Luke's in Boise with our newborn in an incubator with blue lights all over him. To see our fragile little baby alone in a plastic tube was almost more than we could take. Even as he began to show signs of doing better, my heart still raced with fear.

It has not been until now when we have started to get some indication that he is doing better that I have been able to relax a little bit. I love our all our children so much. I cannot imagine life without any of them.

Another feeling that has come this week has been an unimaginable feeling of love. I have felt so much love as Oscar has lain on my chest sleeping or as I have held him in my arms. I felt so much love for my wife as I saw her go through agony to bring this tiny infant into this world. I felt so much love for Allison and Charlie as I saw them so little this week and when I did they held on to me so tightly. I felt such love as I saw them embrace their new little brother with complete love. I am so blessed to have the family I have.

Another feeling that has overcome me this week was one of gratitude. As we went through the birth and rehospitalization of Oscar, my mother was there 100 percent of the time to provide care for Ali and Charlie and to provide any help we might need. She stayed the night at our house two or three times this week to be their in case Charlie or Ali needed something during the night. Before leaving on Friday, she made multiple meals and left them in our freezer so that we would not have to worry about finding food for the next little bit. It was truly a blessing to not have to worry about anything other than my wife and new little child.

This week also has brought with it some feelings of sadness. Amid the jubilation of bringing Oscar home on Sunday (the first time), we received the news that Gordon B. Hinckley, our beloved prophet, had passed away. President Hinckley, I felt, was my prophet. I was 13 when he was called and I have felt such a bond to him. At times it was almost as if he knew me personally. Today was his funeral. As I watched and heard recounted the many miracles that he has brought to pass during his tenure to move forward the work of the Lord I felt such love for him. I am grateful that I have known his example in my life.

I am beginning to see how life can be normal again. I am grateful for the blessings and trials of this week. I am truly blessed.

Slide Show of Oscar Willis Head

Could it be?

Tiff pee'd her pants!! Okay, she is pregnant but come on now. No, I am just joking. Tiff woke me up this morning thinking her water may have started to leak. We are waiting around to call the doctor to see what he has to say. We have every reason to think that is what happened but we will just have to see. Keep your fingers crossed and visit Tiff's blog to help us decide on a name. We will update you all as soon as we know something.

Waiting, Waiting on my World to Change

If you have read my wife's blog you will notice that I am anxious for her to have the baby. We are currently three weeks out from the date the doctors say the baby is due but my intuition tells me that he is ready now (maybe that is just what I want my intuition to say).

I guess I just wanted to say how incredibly glad I am to be a father and that I will be a father again soon. Even more I want to say how incredibly glad I am that I will be a father with the best mom on my team. Tiffany is truly the greatest. She is loving to me and the kids. She is forgiving when I need her to be. She lifts me up when I am not sure I can take it. She lets me lift her when she needs it, too. I love the respect she shows me as a father even though blood says I am not. I just have to say, I am the luckiest man in the world. Oh, and did I mention my wife is super fly!

Now, if only we could convince the baby to come, I would be that much luckier.

Check out my Slide Show!

The Beginning

I never thought I would create one of these cyber journals, aka blogs, but my sister Laura said she felt bad because she did not have enough friends on her blog links so I thought I would help her out. Her blog can be found at http://www.laurasbranch.blogspot.com/. I can almost promise you if you visit her site and post a comment, you will find your link posted on her site in a jiffy.

So, I guess an introduction is in order. Since every so often you might be misfortunate enough to type in the incredibly long URL to this site, you might like to know the man responsible for creating it. My name is Ryan. I am not sure how the name "Tales of the Super Nerd" came to be but it just fit. Let me tell you a little more about myself and you will figure it out very quickly.

I am a 25 year old father of two, would be three if I could convince my wife to just have the baby. I have the most incredible wife. She really is the best and I am not just saying that because she will be joining all you readers to see what I might say here. We were married this last April making me the happiest man on earth and a father of two. Starting out fatherhood with a four and two year old has definitely had some ups and downs but for the most part, it has been better than I could have ever dreamed. My family and I live in Boise, Idaho.

I am a transportation planner working for a regional MPO. It is at this point of my introduction that most eyes glaze over. To start, how many people know what a transportation planner really does. For those that do, most either have some road they want fixed while thinking silently, "who the heck would want to talk about roads all day?" I know, that's what I thought when I started this job. I will explain the insanity at a later time. I do not want to loose all possible readers on my first posting.

I am also a life long student. If I could convince my wife it was necessary and did not get killed in the process, I would probably be going to school for the rest of my life. I am starting back next week as a graduate student at Boise State University (Go, Go Big Blue! Fight, Fight BSU!). I am working towards a masters in a program that only hypothetically exists at this point in time.

I have many interests in life. Being a father and good husband falls at the top of my list. I am a Mormon (Yes I am!) which takes up a good deal of time but also brings a great deal of joy. I am an avid reader with a slight infatuation with the Harry Potter series. I am also a fan of BSU football. I play the guitar or at least I claim I do, not having played in a really long time. My many interests seem to take up my time faster than I can grasp but still I continually find myself looking at something new wondering if I can fit that into my bag of tricks.

At this point, after deleting the link to this blog off of your favorites list, you have probably figured out the "Nerd" part of the title. The "Super" part, well, that's just me trying to make myself feel better. I hope you tune in regularly for the Tales of the Super Nerd.